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Pat Parker

Kathryn S Gardiner | Published on 6/11/2025

Forgotten Foremothers

Profiles of lesser-known heroines in the fight for women’s right


“you were a mistake”

my mother told me

ever since i’ve been

trying to make up.

—Goat Child, 1972

 

Pat Parker was born Jan. 20, 1944, in Houston, Texas. She was the youngest of four daughters born to Marie Louise and Ernest Nathanial Cooks. Mother Marie worked as a domestic servant and father Ernest—also called “Buster”—was a tire retreader. The family lived in poor conditions of the Third Ward.

 

“Parker grew up on the outskirts of Houston, one step away from the projects,” wrote activist, friend, and fellow poet Judy Grahn in the introduction to “Movement in Black,” a collection of Pat’s poetry published in 1978. “She is one Texan who never brags about her state.”

 

I used colored toilets

and rode colored buses home

I went to colored churches

with colored preachers

and prayed to a white God

begged forgiveness for Cain

and his sins

and his descendants

us lowly colored sinners

and the message

was simple

was sharp

there is a place for n____rs

but not among good white folk

—jonestown, 1984

 

In the poem “Goat Child,” Pat wrote her own biography. Indeed, much of her poetry is autobiographical, so her words will join us through the journey of her life. As you’ll read, no one can say it quite how Pat said it. 

 

“‘Goat Child’ was the first deliberately autobiographical poem by a woman that I had ever heard, although there was no reason (try sexism) why a woman’s entire life couldn’t be the storyline of a poem, a modern epic,” Judy marveled. “For people hearing it at the time, the idea that women even had life stories was amazing and nearly unheard of. Parker was making literature out of stuff so buried under American racism and sexism, classism and antilesbianism that it wasn’t even a question of breaking down or reversing a stereotype but of filling up a vacuum where the stereotype would have been if it were not so frightening for most people to even have such thoughts.”

 

Encouraged in school by her father, Pat was an intelligent and perspicacious child. Both injustices from the outside world and conflicts from within stayed with her into adulthood. Her poems vividly capture her experiences as a black girl, a “tomboy,” growing up within the racism and resource-starved regions of a Texan city. 

 

the goat left this child

me still trying to butt

my way in or out

& i came home dripping

blood & panic rode in

on my shoulders.

her slipped to the store

returned clutching a 

box of kotex in a sack

twice as large.

“now you can have babies,

So keep your panties up”

& i couldn’t see the

connection between me &

babies cause i wasn’t

even thinking of marriage

& that always came first.

& him having to admit that

i really was a girl &

all of a sudden no more

football, not even touch

or anything & now getting

angry because i still

didn’t like dolls &

all this time me not knowing

that the real hang up

was something called virginity

which i had already lost

2 years ago to a really

hard up rapist that i

never could tell my parents

about, not really knowing what

had happened but somehow

feeling it would not be

to my advantage.

—Goat Child, 1972

 

Violence, including sexual violence, would mar much of Pat’s childhood and early adulthood. At age 18 in 1962, she graduated high school and left Texas for Los Angeles, Calif. That same year, she met and married Ed Bullins, a playwright heavily involved in the Black Panther Party and 9 years her senior. Together, they relocated to San Francisco’s Bay Area. Though she would not earn another degree, Pat continued her studies, with a particular focus on writing, at community colleges in both LA and San Francisco.

 

In English Lit,.

            they told me

Kafka was good

            because he created

the best nightmares ever—

I think I should

go find that professor

& ask why

we didn’t study

the S.F. Police Dept.

—from “Child of Myself,” 1972

 

In an interview with the Lansing State Journal in 1979, Pat said she started poetry because Ed “constantly criticized her prose. ‘I knew he didn’t know anything about poetry so I tried that. I found it was a lot of fun and actually fairly easy for me.’”

 

The couple would separate after four years of marriage. Pat accused Ed of physical abuse, including pushing her down the stairs and causing her to miscarry a pregnancy. For not the first time, Pat was confronted by that vacuum Judy described—a place not yet defined by those who did not fit society’s established roles. While drawn to Ed’s revolutionary advocacy for Black people, Pat observed that little of that revolution sought to uplift Black women.

 

Brother

            I don’t want to hear

            about

            how my real enemy

            is the system.

i’m no genius,

            but i do know

            that system

you hit me with

            is called

                        a fist.

—from “Child of Myself,” 1972

 

Pat then married fellow writer Robert F. Parker, though the two soon divorced in 1966. In the late 1960s, Pat began to identify as a lesbian and exclusively pursued relationships with women. 

 

My lover is a woman

& when i hold her—

feel her warmth—

i feel good – feel safe

 

then/ i never think of

my families’ voices –

never hear my sisters say – 

bulldaggers, queers, funny – 

come see us, but don’t

bring your friends – 

it’s okay with us, 

but don’t tell mama

            it’d break her heart

never feel my father

turn in his grave

never hear my mother cry

Lord, what kind of child is this?

—My Lover is a Woman, 1973

 

“The liberation she [Pat] felt finally embracing her sexuality is palpable in her poetry,” noted Rae Alexandra in a profile for Bay Area NPR station KQED. “The boldness of ‘My Lover is a Woman’ ... is still astonishing in 2018. In 1968, hearing it for the first time must have felt like an earthquake.”


Marriage to a man, Pat decided, wasn’t a good fit for her. During all this, however, she found something that was: the West Coast community of women poets, including Judy Grahn. As early as 1963, when she was just 19 years old, Pat began sharing her poetry at readings held at bookstores and coffeeshops. Judy recalled, “We both knew it was impossible for us to enter the world of poetry—and consequently we invented another world of poetry, and became peers, and leaders, and friends.”

This community also included such famous poets as Audre Lorde, who met Pat in 1969 and wrote a foreword to “Movement in Black” in 1978. “On the last night of my first trip to the West Coast in 1969, I walked into a room and met a young Black poet with fire in her eyes, a beer in her hand and a smile/scowl on her face,” Audre remembered. “There were poems in her mouth, on the tables, in the refrigerator, under the bed, and in the way she cast about the apartment, searching for—not answers—but rather, unexpressable questions.” 

 


Pat Parker often performed her poetry at bookstores and coffeeshops. Photo courtesy Sinister Wisdom


With Audre, Pat found connection in all the disconnections she felt elsewhere. “We were both Black; we were Lesbians; we were both poets, in a very white, straight, male world, and we sat up all night trading poems,” Audre continued. She and Pat would go on to exchange frequent letters starting in 1974. A collection of their correspondence, “Sister Love,” was published in 2018.

 

With Judy, Pat founded the Women’s Press Collective with the goal of promoting women and lesbian poets. Pat said, “It was like pioneering.... We were talking to women about women, and, at the same time, letting women know that the experiences they were having were shared by other people.” Pat also continued her activism work and kept the title of “feminist,” too, though that wasn’t always easy.

 

Friend Judy said, “Daring to call herself a feminist from the beginning, when even other feminists had swallowed the false line that only white middleclass women need apply—what gall, for a movement which had half its own roots in the Black Power and Civil Rights struggles—Parker remained a feminist anyway—lucky for the rest of us.” Pat’s poetry constantly prods at the limits forced on her, stabbing at those “unexpressable questions” that Audre referenced.





Have you ever tried to hide?

            In a group
                        of women

                                    hide

            yourself

slide between the floor boards

slide yourself away child

            away from this room

                        & your sister

before she notices

            your black self &

her white mind

                        slide your eyes 

 

                                    down

away from other blacks

            afraid – a meeting of eyes

& pain would travel between you –

            change like milk to buttermilk

                        a silent rage.

                        SISTER! your foot’s smaller,

but it’s still on my neck.

—from “Pitstop,” 1973



In a University of Minnesota profile, Ilene Alexander observed that “Parker’s poetry generally escapes didacticism because of her deft use of humor, insistence on frank language, presentations of events and images long silent, and sharp analysis of injustices. The goal, Parker said in an interview with [fellow poet] Kate Rushin, is to ‘try to put the poetry in the language that we speak, to use that language, take those simple works and make out of them something that is moving, that is powerful, that is there.’”

 

Indeed, throughout her career, the structure or apparent simplicity of Pat’s poetry was criticized. Missing from the reading of them is that they were often meant to be heard spoken aloud, and recordings of Pat herself performing them reveal their full dimension. “Her work is simple. Anyone can read it, in a bar, if necessary. The poet herself has done so. That’s the point. It’s simple, but deceptively so,” wrote critic Adrian Oktenberg in a review of Pat’s 1985 collection “Jonestown & other madness” for The Women’s Review of Books. “It is easy for sophisticated literary types to take it for granted, and they have. That’s their loss. In Parker’s work, not a word is wasted.”

 

Within larger society, Pat experienced oppression and marginalization as a Black queer woman. Within lesbian spaces, she experienced alienation as a Black woman. Within Black spaces, she experienced judgement for dating a white woman. Nowhere, it seemed, could contain all that Pat was.

 

And when we go to a gay bar

& my people shun me because I crossed

            the line

& her people look to see what’s

            wrong with her – what defect

            drove her to me – 

 

And when we walk the streets

            of this city – forget and touch

            or hold hands and the people

            stare, glare, frown, & taunt

            at those queers – 

 

I remember

            Every word taught me

            Every word said to me

            Every word done to me

& then I hate – 

i look at my lover

& for an instance – doubt – 

 

Then/ i hold her hand tighter

And i can hear my mother cry

Lord, what kind of child is this.

—My Lover is a Woman, 1973

 

Throughout the 1970s, Pat traveled with other poets and musicians on the “Varied Voices of Black Women” tour. Wendy Stevens, a writer for Off Our Backs, profiled one of Pat’s readings in the May-June 1975 issue. “It takes guts to start out in California and make your way cross country, having made all your contacts by mail, to read your poetry,” she observed. “When Pat Parker, a black lesbian writer, sat and read her poetry to about sixty women at E. Lois ‘Sharon’ Gomillion’s [a D.C.-based Black poet] home—I heard a woman who had taken her message into her own arms and sought to spread it finely to each woman along the way.”

 

In 1978, Pat began working at the Oakland Feminist’s Women’s Health Center as the medical coordinator and executive director where she advocated for abortion rights and reproductive health, especially for the poor and working class. She would hold this position until 1988.

 

each week I go to my group

            see women

                        Black women

Beautiful Black Women

& I am in love

                        with each of them

& this is important

            in the loving

in the act of loving

            each woman

I have learned a new lesson

I have learned

            to love myself.

—Group, 1978

 

In 1980, Pat began a relationship with Martha “Marty” Dunham. Together, the two co-parented daughters Cassidy Brown and Anastasia Jean. Even with a “day job” at the health center and an active family life, Pat’s poetry remained a vibrant outlet for her most complex thoughts and intense feelings. In 1976, Pat’s older sister Shirley was murdered by her husband. Pat recorded the events and her emotions in the powerful poem titled “Womanslaughter,” from learning the news—

 

I used to be fearful

of phone calls in the night – 

never in the day.

 

Death, like the vampire

fears the sun

never in the day – 

“Hello Patty”

“Hey big sister

what’s happening?

How’s the kids?”

“Patty, Jonesy shot Shirley.

She didn’t make it.”

 

—to reflecting on the brother-in-law she’d known—

 

There was a quiet man

He married a quiet wife

Together, they lived

a quiet life.

 

Not so, not so

her sisters said,

the truth comes out

as she lies dead.

 

—to burying her sister—“the four strong daughters of Buster Cooks” becoming three—

 

We came, the three sisters

of Shirley Jones

& took care of her mother.

We picked the right flowers,

contacted insurance companies,

arranged social security payments,

and cremated her.

We came, the three sisters

of Shirley Jones.

We were not strong.

“It is good, they said, 

that Buster is dead.

He would surely kill

the quiet man.”

 

—and through the trial and “justice” in the courtroom.

 

What was his crime?

He only killed his wife.

But a divorce I say.

Not final, they say:

Her things were his

including her life.

Men cannot rape their wives.

Men cannot kill their wives.

They passion them to death.

 

On Nov. 18, 1978, 918 people died at the People’s Temple in Guyana on the northern coast of South America. This event would come to be called the Jonestown massacre, after founder and cult leader Jim Jones. Of those who died by apparent suicide at the compound, the majority were Black. Their leader Jim Jones, however, was white. This haunted and enraged Pat. 

 

“I must ask the question,” she wrote in her introduction to “Jonestown & other madness” in 1984. “If 900 white people had gone to a country with a Black minister and ‘committed suicide,’ would we have accepted the answers we were given so easily?” She explored these thoughts more extensively in a poem titled “jonestown.”

 

Newscasters’ words

slap me in my face

peoples’ tears and grief

emanate from my set

and I remember the lessons

rehear a childhood message

 

Black folks do not commit suicide

 

I thought of my uncle Dave

he died in prison

suicide

the authorities said

“Boy just up and hung hisself”

and I remember my mother

her disbelief, her grief

“Them white folks kilt my brother

Dave didn’t commit no suicide”

and the funeral 

a bitter quiet funeral

his coffin sealed from sighters

and we all knew

Dave died not by his hands

and some guard decided

that n____r should die

 

Through the lens of Jonestown, Pat interrogated a system that left Black people vulnerable to myriad abuses and then blamed them for being abused.

 

An interview with a live one

“You were a member of People’s Temple?”

“Yes, I was.”

“Why did you join?”

“Well, I went there a few times

and then I stopped going, but

the Rev. Jones came by my house

and asked me why I quit coming.

I was really surprised.

No one had ever cared

that much about me before.”

 

No one had ever cared

that much about me before

and it came home

the messages of my youth

came clear

the Black people

in Jonestown

did not commit suicide

they were murdered

they were murdered in

small southern towns

they were murdered in

big northern cities

 

they were murdered

as school children

by teachers

who didn’t care

they were murdered

by policemen

who didn’t care

they were murdered

by welfare workers

who didn’t care

they were murdered

by shopkeepers

who didn’t care

they were murdered

by church people

who didn’t care

they were murdered

by politicians

who didn’t care

they didn’t die at Jonestown

they went to Jonestown dead

convinced that America

and Americans

didn’t care

 

they died 

in the schoolrooms

they died

in the streets

they died

in the bars

they died 

in the jails

they died

in the churches

they died

in the welfare lines

 

Jim Jones was not the cause

he was the result

of 400 years

of not caring

 

Black folks do not

Black folks do not

Black folks do not commit suicide.

 

Some of the “other madnesses” Pat’s poetry frequently explored were the cultural fears about the queer population of the United States, fears that Pat pokes at with incisive wit.

 

There are those who think

or perhaps don’t think

that children and lesbians

together can’t make a family

that we create an extension

of perversion.

 

They think

or perhaps don’t think

that we have different relationships

with our children

that instead of getting up

in the middle of the night

for a 2 AM and 6 AM feeding

we rise up and chant

“you’re gonna be a dyke

you’re gonna be a dyke.”

—legacy, for Anastasia Jean, 1985

 

you know some people

got a lot of nerve.

sometimes, i don’t believe

the things i see and hear.

 

Have you met the woman

who’s shocked by 2 women kissing

& in the same breath,

tells you that she’s pregnant?

BUT GAYS SHOULDN’T BE BLATANT.

— For the Straight Folks

Who Don’t Mind Gays

But Wish They Weren’t So BLATANT, 1985

 

In 1985, Pat wrote to her friend Audre, debating the idea of leaving her job to write full time. “Beware the terror of not producing. Beware the urge to justify your decision. Watch out for the kitchen sink and the plumbing and the painting that always needed being done. But remember the body needs to create too,” Audre wrote back. Pat would leave her position at the Oakland Feminist’s Women’s Health Center in 1988.

 

She died the following year in Oakland, Calif. on June 19 of breast cancer. She was only 45 years old. She left behind partner Marty and daughters Cassidy and 6-year-old Anastasia. Her work would go on to inspire future artists and poets. New York City’s Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual & Transgender Community Center founded their library in 1991 and named it—The Pat Parker/Vito Russo Center Library—in honor of Pat and film historian and author Vito Russo. 

 

“Sometimes I wonder whether just writing is enough–I mean as far as creating the revolution,” Pat mused in 1975. Off Our Backs reviewer Wendy went on to say, “I wanted to tell Pat Parker that living and writing was enough. I wanted to tell her that living, writing, and getting up off your chair and reading it to strangers/women alike was plenty.”

 

“I asked her once about her personal idea of a revolution,” friend Judy said in her “Movement in Black” introduction. “What would she want to see happen. She said, ‘If I could take all my parts with me when I go somewhere, and not have to say to one of them, “No, you stay home tonight, you won’t be welcome,” because I’m going to an all-white party where I can be gay, but not Black. Or I’m going to a Black poetry reading, and half of the poets are antihomosexual, or thousands of situations where something of what I am cannot come with me. The day all the different parts of me can come along, we would have what I would call a revolution.’ It is, as she says in one of her poems, a ‘simple’ dream.”

 

Writer Lyndie Brimstone acknowledged this simple dream in a “Feminist Review” tribute to Pat in 1990. “A simple dream, perhaps,” she noted, “but who will work for it now Pat Parker has gone? Is it safe, with us?”





Sharp humor and incisive social commentary are hallmarks of Pat Parker’s poetry, as seen in excerpts from her collections Movements in Black and Pit Stop











Sources:

Pit Stop by Pat Parker

Child of Myself by Pat Parker

Movement in Black by Pat Parker

Jonestown & other madness by Pat Parker

KQED: The Oakland Poet Who Brought Lesbian Feminism to the Fore

Poetry Foundation: Pat Parker

University of Minnesota: Voices from the Gap – Pat Parker

Public Books: From “Sister Love: The Letters of Audre Lorde and Pat Parker”

Off Our Backs: Reading her work

The Women’s Review of Books: A Quartet of Voices

Lansing State Journal: April 19, 1979

Feminist Review: A Tribute

Vice: The Radical Poetry of Audre Lorde’s Confidante, Pat Parker

The Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, & Transgender Community Center: Library

Ms.: On Editing ‘Sister Love’

Wikipedia: Pat ParkerEd BullinsJudy GrahnJonestown